kaytebug
12-27-2006, 12:03 PM
Hi everyone, hope you had a wonderful Christmas holiday.
I'm back to work, hitting the ground running yesterday (I hate and love short weeks). Anyway, for the second time this holiday season, our Movie review guy dropped the ball and didn't get me a review for our After Hours page. Which left me writing an editor's column (another dropped ball) and a movie review yesterday.
Anyway, I've posted both on my blog. I'd love feedback on my writing style. Do the pieces (two different styles of writing) flow ok? What do you like about them? What would you change?
In the case of the movie review, would you rent the DVD?
Anyway, any critiques would be greatly appreciated. It looks like I'm now oficially our "back up" movie review person...
Thanks a ton
Kaylea
I'm back to work, hitting the ground running yesterday (I hate and love short weeks). Anyway, for the second time this holiday season, our Movie review guy dropped the ball and didn't get me a review for our After Hours page. Which left me writing an editor's column (another dropped ball) and a movie review yesterday.
Anyway, I've posted both on my blog. I'd love feedback on my writing style. Do the pieces (two different styles of writing) flow ok? What do you like about them? What would you change?
In the case of the movie review, would you rent the DVD?
Anyway, any critiques would be greatly appreciated. It looks like I'm now oficially our "back up" movie review person...
Thanks a ton
Kaylea
ronee
12-27-2006, 02:22 PM
I think your articles are great. I love the topics you chose for both. They definitely are cohesive and easy to read.
I personally dislike parenthesis. I think in your collumn they could be replaced by a comma on both sides of the phrase, as an interjection in the sentence. And in the movie review the parenthesis "from adults no less" takes away from the strength of the sentence. Just my opinion though.
Everything else I think is wonderful, I have seen Born into Brothells and you do a wonderful job of describing it.
What publication do you work for??
I personally dislike parenthesis. I think in your collumn they could be replaced by a comma on both sides of the phrase, as an interjection in the sentence. And in the movie review the parenthesis "from adults no less" takes away from the strength of the sentence. Just my opinion though.
Everything else I think is wonderful, I have seen Born into Brothells and you do a wonderful job of describing it.
What publication do you work for??
kaytebug
12-27-2006, 02:27 PM
Ronee
Thanks
I work for www.joplindaily.com it's a community newspaper in southwest Missouri. It's a daily net paper and a weekly print edition.
Thanks for the comments. I need the feedback, especially as I develop my "style."
Kaylea
Thanks
I work for www.joplindaily.com it's a community newspaper in southwest Missouri. It's a daily net paper and a weekly print edition.
Thanks for the comments. I need the feedback, especially as I develop my "style."
Kaylea
SteinwaysMom/DebraTope
12-27-2006, 08:44 PM
I enjoyed the articles. It's nice to hear about people helping people. I have also seen the Brothels movie and the thought the review was very good.
cggibson
12-27-2006, 10:16 PM
Wow, your write beautifully! I love it!!!
VickiStegall
12-28-2006, 06:14 AM
I don't really have any CC as I got lost in the topics and forgot I was supposed to offer CC. I suppose that's a good thing as I really did enjoy your writing. It conversational and easy to read (I like that!). You did a great job!!!!
I really, really, really like your Mudstock layout too :)
I really, really, really like your Mudstock layout too :)
kaytebug
12-28-2006, 08:32 AM
Thanks
The Mudstock layout came from an event, the local police and fire department put on every year.
They dig a giant (I'm not good with distance) circular trench complete with rope swings at the start and lots of pits, hills and other "natural" slides and then flood it with the fire truck.
It becomes a swampy, muddy, mucky and totally fun thing for kids of all ages. It's part of the DARE (Drug resistance education) program.---showing kids they can have fun without drugs or alcohol.
Anyway, the kids are my friend's boys, he was taking pics for the paper (a sister pub to my paper), and I decided to focus on his kids. Aren't they too cute for words.
In a year or two, little sister, who was born in November, can join them...ok maybe three years....
Anyway, that's the "back story" behind the layout. I tried a photoshop trick to get the main photo as the background paper. It's the only one I've done like that, but I want to try more.
K.
The Mudstock layout came from an event, the local police and fire department put on every year.
They dig a giant (I'm not good with distance) circular trench complete with rope swings at the start and lots of pits, hills and other "natural" slides and then flood it with the fire truck.
It becomes a swampy, muddy, mucky and totally fun thing for kids of all ages. It's part of the DARE (Drug resistance education) program.---showing kids they can have fun without drugs or alcohol.
Anyway, the kids are my friend's boys, he was taking pics for the paper (a sister pub to my paper), and I decided to focus on his kids. Aren't they too cute for words.
In a year or two, little sister, who was born in November, can join them...ok maybe three years....
Anyway, that's the "back story" behind the layout. I tried a photoshop trick to get the main photo as the background paper. It's the only one I've done like that, but I want to try more.
K.
SteinwaysMom/DebraTope
12-28-2006, 11:19 AM
Wow, what a blast. I pity the poor moms who have to do laundry though.
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